Led Zeppelin Tickets Hard to Find? Try Lez Zeppelin Instead!

Freaks. Has all the talk of Led Zeppelin tickets going onsale got you all floppy and disoriented? Gotcha goin’ ape with eagerness, flailing like a rock ‘n’ roll whirling dervish around the ziggurat of your personal crediverse in a kinetic Led Zeppelin tickets trance? Tickets to Led Zep won’t be easy to find when they do finally get printed, that’s for sure, so you might wanna consider an alternative:
2008’s Bonnaroo Festival in Tennessee – the seventh, no less; quite a feat for anything in this country, where a business is considered “successful” if it has been up and running since Led Zep retired – sees a little twist to the usual parade of Indie bands and other professional hipsters. From the (uncredible) credibility industry, in the form of some young ladies calling themselves Lez Zeppelin, we now have choices! That’s right, Lez Zeppelin. They do covers of the Zep catalog, but they’re all female and the Lezzies (if that wasn’t their nickname it is now) are the first pure tribute band to play Bonnaroo in its seven years of hipness and coolness and credible suchness. Who’da thunk it, huh? Lez Zeppelin.

I know you just want to run out and buy Bonnaroo tickets, or Lez Zeppelin tickets, or whatever, but wait, I haven’t finished; I want to say filthy things about this Lez Zeppelin, politically incorrect sexisms that get me fired from my job here at Watson Towers, disgusting suggestive asides about what they might do with their xylophone hammer, or the proper way for a “Lez” band to rough-ride an electric instrument's big fat feedback riffs, or what you might see if you buy tickets to Lez Zeppelin and they’re for the front row, and you look up just as singer Sarah McLellan is going hell-for-leather at “Rock ‘n’ Roll” and you see, er, you see – wait for it – you see Robert Plant there, with a big curly-haired skull on him and a loaded larynx full of gravel-screams and a pair of tight Levis (complete with balled-up sock for old times sake)! You wanted an up-skirt perv moment, you wanted the full-on womanhood of a twisted nation in your face (she’s Australian before you Yanks start). Confused, you look down at the Lez Zeppelin ticket in your sweaty palm, and discover that it’s actually a Led Zeppelin ticket. That really is Plant and the balled-up sock up there, and not some other…thing. And you are actually disappointed!
Could that ever happen? To me, it could. Those Lezzies are lovely. Check ‘em out.