Plugged In blogs

Cheap Demi Lovato Tickets and Selena Gomez Not Pregnant or on Drugs Shocker!!!

Bernard Watson — Fri, 20 Jun 2008 17:25:45 -0400

Demi Lovato tickets are gonna be selling like hot buns very soon - if not already - and demand from all quadrants will whip up a storm of speculation, gossip and depraved jackal-like behavior, most probably from those educated and informed enough to know better. That's right; I'm talking about you. You and your unquenchable desire for Jonas Brothers tickets, Demi Lovato tickets and other tweenstuff. And of course, there'll be the others, the lurking vile predators who are the secondary audience; human males of the full or semi-grown variety who we needn't discuss too much here. And I'm not just talking about the paparazzi with their "Miley Cyrus Pregnant!" headlines.
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US Air Guitar Championships Tickets? Whatever Next?

Bernard Watson — Tue, 03 Jun 2008 16:22:11 -0400

Do you play Air Guitar? Huh? Come on, don’t give me that rolling your eyes look, answer me! Do. You. Play. Air. Guitar. Eh? Because if you do, you’d better buy US Air Guitar Championships tickets and get your booty down to the American Air Guitar Challenge which starts today, June 3, 2008, in New York City!
I’m not messing around here; you know you can do this. After all, weren’t you the man, back in the day? When you thought your big sister was off doing chores, she was actually creased up with laughter, spying through the door-crack while you made an utter polyp of yourself in front of that mirror you loved so much. Air guitar ain’t for sissies or quitters, that’s for sure. You have to be ready to take some flak in that game. You have to be prepared to truly die (of embarrassment) for your art. I personally have a long and distinguished career as a major "airness" figure (in my house at least), and I can take you through 3 Doors Down’s “Kryptonite” better than Matt Roberts himself! They’d flock to buy 3 Doors Down tickets if they thought they’d get to hear my Superman, or Krytonite, whatever it’s called. Don’t get me wrong, I’m under no illusions; I know that particular solo is nothing special. Not like when I’m totally in the zone and the proper dancing starts and I throw something like “Sweet Child O’ Mine” on there by G&R. Now that’s air guitar, let me tell you. I’m not saying I go the whole hog – put a bandana on, or even a wig, for that matter – but I do let rip and give ‘em what they want, the imaginary 150,000 crowd, that is. So what of it, Punkness? You gonna get down to that thur Big Apple and grapple with some air? You gonna strap on that nonexistent appendage and hit those high nothing notes on that imaginary Stairway to Heaven of yours?

Madonna Tickets and Five Pound Notes. Just Divine!

Bernard Watson — Tue, 20 May 2008 15:57:30 -0400

She's attracted attention to herself for snogging Britney, shagging Sean Penn, and marrying wannaba-working-class-but-really-a-middle-class-drip-from-London Guy Ritchie.

Recently she seems to have sparked a mass Hollywood flip to quasi-mystico-Judaism, with Demi Moore, Lindsey Lohan, and Britney Spears (again!) following suit, sporting braided red wrist-strings the significance of which surely none of them have the foggiest idea. But rumors are now pointing to the divorce courts for the artist formerly known as Madonna Louise Veronica Ciccone and her poof-guy-not-tough-guy Guy. If those two split, there'll be plenty of five-pound notes flying, that's for sure. I believe in England they call them "sky-divers", fivers. Or "deep sea divers"...
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Sting Under Fire as his Reputation Cools

Alexandra Owens — Wed, 14 May 2008 17:14:52 -0400

With thousands of acres of rainforest being demolished every year for farmland and wood harvesting, charities are scrambling at the chance to preserve one of the world’s natural wonders. We all thought that Gordon Sumner, also known as superstar "Sting," and his wife Trudie Styler were heading up a noble effort with their Rainforest Foundation Charity. However, It has recently come to the attention of Charity Navigator, a charity evaluator, that less than half of the monies raised at Sting’s 2006 charity concert were actually allocated to rainforest efforts. This earned the foundation a zero stars out of a possible four for effectiveness.
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What Was Mariah Carey Thinking?

Alexandra Owens — Tue, 06 May 2008 12:55:55 -0400

If you haven't heard the utterly tragic news yet, you soon will; prima donna Mariah Carey rushed to the altar with "Wild N' Out" actor Nick Cannon last Wednesday, April 30th. The shocking nuptials, which were recently confirmed by Cannon's family, took place at Carey's Eleuthera estate in the Bahamas. Sources close to Victoria's Secret model Selita Ebanks, Cannon's ex-fiancé, suspect that the 17 carat diamond bling Carey has been sporting recently is Ebanks' recycled engagement ring. Real classy Cannon...

To top off the jaw-dropping news, the two got hitched without a pre-nup! Do we have another Kevin Federline on our hands? If so, we may have to grab some Mariah Carey tickets soon because this girl is gonna' need the money. At 38, being 11 years Cannon's senior, we have to wonder if this is a shotgun wedding. Poor Child...
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What Was Mariah Carey Thinking?!

Alexandra Owens — Mon, 05 May 2008 13:28:43 -0400

Kenny Chesney Tour Shedule, Tickets Sales Not Affected by Singer's Accident

Bernard Watson — Tue, 29 Apr 2008 11:16:16 -0400

Country superstar Kenny Chesney's latest tour almost suffered a set-back this week, when the ten-gallon titan injured his foot during a concert Saturday. The incident occurred while Chesney was performing at Columbia, South Carolina's Williams-Brice Stadium, and the singer finished the show in some pain but confident the Kenny Chesney tour schedule will not be affected. This will be a relief to his vast body of fans distributed along the tour route.

Apparently, Chesneys boot was stuck between the stage and a hydraulic platform which rose up next to him. He was pinned in this position for about half a minute, but was then released. Chesney continued to perform in some pain and with a pronounced limp, and he had to have his cowboy boot cut off when the show ended. An X-ray showed crushed bones in Chesney's foot, but he remains determined that the show must go on. This includes the Austin, Texas show planned for Thursday, May 1.
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Why Daughtry Means the End of Civilization

Bernard Watson — Tue, 25 Mar 2008 11:29:09 -0400

Remember when you could walk into a bookstore and there were just two sections – Fiction and Non-Fiction? Or a record store (assuming you remember what records were and aren’t just being a trendy "vinyl freak" or whatever you Johnny-come-latelys are calling yourselves these days)? There’d be a ton of Rock/Pop and then some Classical, and that’d be it. Rock and Pop included everything from Psychedelic, Punk, Blues, New Wave, and Electronica, to Ska, Bluebeat, Folk, and Country. Nowadays we have "nu-" this and "nu-" that. Nu? Wasn’t that a super-civilization from before Atlantis or something? Don’t tell me; it doesn’t matter.
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Are You a New Pornographer or Just a Stumblin’ Fool?

Bernard Watson — Mon, 03 Mar 2008 17:06:25 -0500

StumbleUpon is a bloody great power for the old attention-grabbing, isn’t it? An awesome plugin with which to turn the collective head of the blogosphere, and make some (hopefully) viral statement that guarantees your fifteen minutes of cyber-fame? But in the past few months, I’ve noticed one little glitch in the mechanics of the social tool, and in some cases it could make or break a website’s respectability. That’s right, it’s the pesky category button, that which defines a website’s contents on the search results page. Upon being asked to provide information about their site on StumbleUpon, many are choosing the “Adult” option, in the mistaken belief that the cuss-words or financial discussion in their gourmet food and wine blog qualifies it thus. But no, people! Upon choosing the “Adult” option, you automatically have the word Pornography situated right next to the name of your site for all the Googlers to see! Or are you actually a New Pornographer in town? Nobody knows unless they click, and if they don’t click, they don’t visit, and you know where this is going…if they are looking for The New Pornographers tickets they’ll be out of luck won’t they?
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Led Zeppelin Tickets Hard to Find? Try Lez Zeppelin Instead!

Bernard Watson — Fri, 08 Feb 2008 13:26:44 -0500

Freaks. Has all the talk of Led Zeppelin tickets going onsale got you all floppy and disoriented? Gotcha goin’ ape with eagerness, flailing like a rock ‘n’ roll whirling dervish around the ziggurat of your personal crediverse in a kinetic Led Zeppelin tickets trance? Tickets to Led Zep won’t be easy to find when they do finally get printed, that’s for sure, so you might wanna consider an alternative:
2008’s Bonnaroo Festival in Tennessee – the seventh, no less; quite a feat for anything in this country, where a business is considered “successful” if it has been up and running since Led Zep retired – sees a little twist to the usual parade of Indie bands and other professional hipsters. From the (uncredible) credibility industry, in the form of some young ladies calling themselves Lez Zeppelin, we now have choices! That’s right, Lez Zeppelin. They do covers of the Zep catalog, but they’re all female and the Lezzies (if that wasn’t their nickname it is now) are the first pure tribute band to play Bonnaroo in its seven years of hipness and coolness and credible suchness. Who’da thunk it, huh? Lez Zeppelin.
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